I was born into a religious family and wore the cloak of Catholicism well into my forties. When I look back I invested in religion as one would an insurance policy; it was there in case I became lost and could not find my way back. There were rules to follow and fees to pay to keep the insurance up-to-date. I did not read the fine print; I paid my dues like everyone else and immersed myself in the rubrics. In doing so I sold out; aligning myself to an institution which like many others, played a significant role in creating divisions on a world scale right down to the most intimate of relationships. I invested heavily in religious insurance to the point that I entered a Catholic religious order for a couple of years with full intent of dedicating my self to God for the rest of my days.
On reflection, when I look at how I was living within that religion, I anxiously lived in a way where I followed the rules, in what may be described as trance like, participating in the activities of daily living that were underlined with expectation, tradition and fear. I sought recognition and acknowledgement for my efforts as I ticked the boxes of success. This way of life allowed me to lay low somehow, always feeling that I didn’t quite get what life was about; I was ‘mixed up’, not really fitting within the so called norms and yet not feeling free to embrace fully, what I now know was the magnetic pull of my heart.
There were times when I would connect with the inner sanctum of my being and feel stillness and a simplicity that was deep and expansive. This was my place of understanding and knowing. I had no way of being able to make this inner truth of mine relatable in the structured setup called society in which my outside life was lived. Instead, I would come out into the reality and activities of daily living and rely on my insurance policy, my religion to navigate me.
Little did I know that in the fine print in my religious insurance was the clause that stated that the policy did not cover the journey to the inner heart, which pulses with and is breathed by the universe itself! This universal pulse was my true connection where division cannot exist. I had invested in a scam! I had allowed myself to be duped and it had cost me my life so far, my true life.
A dozen or so years ago I met Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. In the presence of this wise and truly heart led man, and by attending many, many of his presentations and participating in the healing modalities informed by The Ageless Wisdom, I have had my inner sanctum reflected back to me.
My lives on earth now make sense! This is not it! We all know it but most of us happily buy all types of metaphoric insurance to justify and validate us – like a ticket to authenticate our life and give us passage through its many constructed systems. The saying goes that many insurance policies are not worth the paper they are written on. Many lives lived, including many of my own, have not honoured the ever pulsing truth waiting to be felt and actively lived.
Through staying connected to my inner sanctum I am learning (without perfection) to live in a way that reflects, honours and pulses my connection to the universal home where we all belong. Living this connection by confirming the movement, depth and stillness of the universe in my body is my religion, and it is called The Way of The Livingness.
What a homecoming with no need for any ‘middle man’, any false insurance policy! Thank you Serge Benhayon for showing me, by your livingness, how to live the inside on the outside. No more being ‘mixed up’ by beliefs that form a detour away from the truth and pulse of the inner heart; a detour that can only eventually lead back to where it began.